I am conflicted on the “picky eater” issue.
This plate found me the other day, and I couldn’t decide how I felt about it.
On the one hand, I feel like children should eat what the grown-ups eat without any cajoling or bribing or games involved.
This is the way it’s done in most other countries and to mostly fantastic results. When kids aren’t “allowed” to be picky, they tend to eat more well-rounded meals, whine less, and are in general a lot healthier.
In her book “Bringing Up Bebe” Pamela Druckerman further explains the ins and outs of children’s eating habits in her expat country of France. It’s worth a read.
On the other hand, I am sympathetic to parents of toddlers who struggle daily to get their kids to eat their broccoli.
We have taken a pretty hard line with our kids on food. They eat what we eat or they don’t eat. We don’t fight at dinner to “make” them eat. We try to keep dinnertime light and fun.
That being said, there are a few strategies that I’ve found useful in “teaching” our children to eat in a well-rounded manner.
Below are some “hard-line” approaches to dealing with children and food and also some “soft-line” strategies. No judgement here.
The “Hardline”
1. Tally Chart
I got this idea from Druckerman’s book and then took the idea very literally.
Druckerman asserts that the problem we have in the States is that we only offer children a food choice two, three, maybe four times and then give up. In France, they offer the choice twenty, thirty times.
The tricky thing here is that it often feels like you’ve offered your child asparagus twenty times before you finally give up. When in reality, it’s only been twice.
So, to this end, I made a very simple chart.
I listed all the veggies down the left side and left room on the right side to make a tally mark every time I offered that food. To keep it super simple I just started with veggies, but you could add any food you think is important and you predict will be a struggle to get your child to eat.
Then, every time I offered that food to our children, I simply made a tally mark. I kept it taped to the fridge for easy access.
I was shocked to see that a) I only offered foods two to three times before I felt like giving up and b) there were some vegetables that I didn’t even offer at all. The chart served as a great reminder of what veggies I needed to remember to cook up and offer.
2. Thank You Bites I got this from a babysitter that use to watch our children. She would encourage the boys to take a “thank you bite” of everything on their plate. The purpose here is two fold: 1) it gets the children to try new foods and 2) it teaches appreciation for the person that has taken time and effort to make a nice meal for them.
3. Cook With Your Children
You’ve heard it before. Let me tell you this though – it doesn’t have to be a big production. You don’t have to make everything from scratch or even involve your kid in the whole meal. Just let them take part in one of the dishes. Or part of one of the dishes. Let them cut the veggies, or season the meat or stir the sauce. We have found that having one child involved in the kitchen for even five minutes during meal prep increases the amount of that dinner they are willing to eat by about 50%.
Sometimes my perfectionistic tendencies keep this from happening. I think I have to have a whole lesson on proper veggie cutting or I need toddler knives (do those exist?), or the perfect toddler-friendly recipe, but really, all I need is five minutes of shared attention with one child. It doesn’t really matter whether we’re slicing bread or breaking pasta or stirring dough.
The “Soft line”:
4. Cupcake Pan Surprise
Take a cupcake pan. Place a small sticker on the bottom of the pan. Place little bits of various foods in each spot (carrots, cheese, broccoli, peas, dried cranberries, etc…). Tell your child that if they try the food that is in the spot with the sticker underneath, that they get a treat. The treat can be edible or not, but don’t reveal what it is. If you do they may just decide they don’t want the treat and not engage in the exercise. The idea is that since they don’t know which cup the sticker is under, they will try something from each section.
5. Dinner Game Board
Make dinner a game with the above mentioned Dinner Winner Kids Plate.
I think this could be a fun choice for special dinners or every Friday night maybe. I wouldn’t use it every night as it might quickly lose its appeal. Or become a struggle instead of fun.
Maybe this one would be good for a night you’re making spinach and peas!
Now it’s your turn – do you take a hard line or a soft line when it comes to dinnertime and “yucky” foods? What strategies do you use?